Ragamuffins

Today was a sad sad day. Today, I came to the realization that I have become the type person I swore I would never become: the raggedy mom with the raggedy kid...

It all began last night.......

Everyone who knows me knows that math is my very LEAST favorite subject. So... having a math test Wednesday afternoon, I stayed up until two o'clock in the morning studying. After studying, I creeped into our room where Craig was fast asleep and trying not to wake him, I quietly shut the door to our bathroom and took a quick shower. I did not even try to blow dry my hair and went to bed with a wet head. (Sleeping on wet hair ALWAYS make my hair crazy!)

Of course, Brylee was up two or three times after I went to bed. (I love teething!)

This morning, I rolled out of bed to the sound of Brylee weeping and wailing in her crib.... And on my way out of the room I ran into the bed post because I was so exhausted.

After breakfast I had my whole day planned out. I had four (very long) chapters left to study for my test and I made myself a schedule. I gave myself a certain amount of time to study each section so that I would be finished by the time I had to leave for class this afternoon. It would be very close, but if I stuck to my schedule, I would finish studying.

Things didn't go quite as planned. Brylee was getting into EVERYTHING. She puts everything in her mouth so you have to watch her extra close. She was extra needy for attention and Barney just wasn't cutting it.

Brylee went down for her morning nap and it was FINALLY quiet. I began studying and was making great time. I was able to focus. I began to feel pretty good about things. Right then.....My phone rang.

Mom was on the other end of the line telling me what a wonderful time they are having in Fort george. Then She asked me if I would drive over to her house to write a check for the cleaning ladies. Inside I was thinking, "Do you understand what this means? I have a a schedule to keep! I only have "X" amount of minutes to study each section, and if I don't stick to it....I won't pass my test!".....but on the outside I said, "sure". I began thinking, if I speed over there as fast as I can and rush home, I can be home and only lose about 45 minutes of studying time.

I went upstairs, threw my nappy hair ( from sleeping on it wet) into a ponytail, and put on a pair of jeans(...the dirty jeans with holes that I wore the entire day yesterday while I cleaned). I woke up brylee, fed her a quick spaghettios lunch, put on my sunglasses to cover my make-up-less face, and rushed out the door to go to moms. I began to drive as fast as I could.

On my way over to moms, I got pulled over.....and got a ticket!!!! (of course, it was just one of those mornings)

I finally made it to mom's and headed back home. I drove very slowly this time, not wanting another TICKET! I was trying to study while driving, but Brylee was screaming as loud as she has ever screamed. She doesn't enjoy riding in the car these days. I started yawning as I passed a grocery store and decided I was going to go buy myself an energy drink.

We finally made it into the store and I picked up an energy drink....and then I picked up another one.

So....here is the point of my story:

As we walked out of the store I came to my realization. There I was...... crazy hair pulled back into a bun, absolutely NO make-up, wearing the t-shirt I slept in and my dirty jeans with holes. To top it off.....I was wearing no deodorant. I looked over at Brylee. She still had spaghettios all over her face and clothes, her ponytail was sticking out from her head at a weird angle with her hair bow literally hanging from 2 strands of hair. It flopped around with each step we took. Her diaper was sagging down to her knees because she has a new waterbottle that she drinks out of non-stop...and her diaper fills up every 20 minutes. And she was wearing no shoes.

We looked like a couple of ragamuffins!

At that moment, Brylee gave me a big squinty faced, spaghettios smile and my heart melted. I realized that we were a mess and that people were giving us looks in the store. But I also realized that none of that stuff mattered anymore. There was a time when I never would have imagined going into a store looking like that. But things have changed a lot in the last year. I realized that being a mom is tough.. it makes your house a disaster, it makes you get little to no sleep, it makes going to school and studying for math tests nearly impossible.......but it also teaches you how to stop being selfish and self centered and how to love someone more than you ever thought possible.

I wouldn't change a thing.

I'm so thankful that heavenly father trusted me to raise Brylee and that I have an eternal family. That makes me way happier than passing any test or looking like a supermodel.